Thursday

Thursday

     So I have news and it's bad. They found Joe’s body in the ditch just up the road near the hospital. Also one of Dad’s cars was towed away from near the hospital. The police came to talk to Dad because they found one of his business cards in Joe’s wallet. They weren’t sure how long he had been there but they said that it looked like a hit and run. They asked Dad a lot of questions about Joe and his friends (not many) and his habits (mostly bad) and some other stuff. Dad looked pretty upset at the news. I wanted to ask the policeman about Mama but Dad gave me his scary face when I hung around so I had to walk away.

     It's so crazy that Joe is dead. I am not sure what this means since Mama is not here too. I guess part of me thought that maybe he knew something about where she was but now that’s not happening. Every day that goes by I feel worse and more scared about Mama. I also feel worse and more mad at Dad because he is not doing anything or saying anything about her. It must have been a huge fight! I need to talk to somebody about this. It is making me stressed!

     Whenever I was really upset Mama would have me close my eyes and she would ask me to pretend that I was at the beach. She would get me to breathe really deeply and then she would talk about the waves and the sand and the sun and so I would feel so relaxed and so warm and calm. It was the best! 

     I just wish that I could talk to her right now. I am worried about asking Dad. He is pretty upset about Joe. We have known him a long time but I need to ask Dad some questions. Nothing makes sense right now!

     I feel really sad about Joe. He was a nice old guy who was sometimes moody and had fusses with my dad but he always remembered my birthday and would give me a card with a five dollar bill in it. That was a lot of money for him so I really appreciated it. It would sometimes bug me though that it seemed like he was always having an argument with my dad and then Dad would be really mad afterwards and hard to talk to. Their fights were usually about stupid stuff. Joe must have had a disability just like me because Mama said he got a cheque once a month from the government. He really had a hard time making his money last for a whole month so he would be always asking people if he could borrow twenty bucks. My dad said that Joe had too much month at the end of the money. I am not sure if that is a line from a country music song but it sounds like it should be. Joe used to live across the street from us but he stopped paying his rent and he had so much stuff in his house that he was sleeping on a mattress by the door in the kitchen so he got kicked out. At that time he had a van so for a while he lived in our driveway but then he couldn't  pay the insurance so he stopped driving it and then he was stuck. Or we were stuck with him. At first Mama was really mad about it but then time went by and she just gave up. It's not that she didn't want to help Joe; she just wasn't sure about having a strange man living in our driveway. Anyway he turned out to be pretty harmless and he was actually pretty handy to have around when leaves needed raking or something needed power-washing. He sure loved to rake!